By Steve Beckow, Golden Age of Gaia, December 14, 2015

Since it’s been my job, my mission to go through Ascension publicly, an Ascension diary is probably what I’ve been writing for several years now.

I accepted a mission in the consciousness shift that’s happening around the Earth right now as a pillar and communicator.

A pillar remains to the last, shuts off the lights and closes the door.

A communicator goes public with … whatever. Unlike an ordinary citizen, who doesn’t necessarily go public with … whatever it is that concerns him or her … a communicator agrees to do so.

Perhaps they’re a news anchor. Or a print journalist. Or a novelist. Or a painter. Whatever it is they communicate, they choose to do it publicly.

I’m an awareness writer. And I communicate what comes to my awareness.

That means that I don’t interest myself necessarily in the mechanics of the body, save as energy flows through it. I’m not medically oriented or “health” oriented, much to the chagrin of many friends around me.

I’m certainly not interested in the chemical formula of something or its biological process.

Culture, yes. Patterns in behavior, yes. Thought systems, linguistics, communication practices, yes to all of them. Biology, chemistry, physics, medicine, no.

If I were talking to a social scientist, I’d say that mine is an ethnographic record. It proceeds by self-observation and self-reporting. It’s a historical record in that it proceeds in discrete time and space, to a discrete individual (me).

Another name for it is “biographical,” as in a biography written ethnographically. Now to what it’s not.

Being an ethnographic record, and again this is for social scientists, it’s neither structural-functional nor evolutionary in structure or aims.  In my work, I don’t consider the questions proper to those fields in these studies.

I’m interested in consciousness. That doesn’t mean just thoughts. Feelings are the most important thing to know if one is interacting with others. How do you feel? How do you feel about that? Until we know how one another feels, we’re not well prepared to act.

I operate in an essentially internal world. As a follower of the path of awareness, the proper object to keep track of is myself – my thoughts and feelings, my prejudices and preferences, my wily little tricks and acts of generosity. I am the object of my attention.

I don’t find that narcissistic. If narcissism came up, that too would be observed. And the mere act of passively observing dissolves whatever “glue” there is in any thought or feeling or memory.  Narcissism wouldn’t stand the dissolutive impact of the truth lovingly self-observed. It’s not permanent, eternal, and love is.

I watch how I grow, evolve or devolve over time, keeping track of where I came from in terms of consciousness and contemplating where I want to end up.

This is who I am and what I do in the matter of building Nova Earth. This is the area in which I make my contribution. This, that I just described.

It’s OK not to find my explorations interesting. Awareness as a path is not for everyone. Nor is my writing.

But this is nevertheless the crystal brick I add to the wall of Nova Gaia. This is my contribution.

Much of my writing proceeds by “noticings,” which I share with you. If we were in each other’s person, you’d follow up my “share” with a share of your own.  Usually a noticing.

After both of us shared, we’d compare notes. Or noticings. That would be our spiritual currency – sharing our noticings about ourselves.

Then we’d put into practice what we learned. The growth setting I spent so much time in many years ago was a constantly-evolving world. It was a world drenched in love. Not at the outset, but over time. As vasanas lifted and we found ourselves able to be with each other.

Not like this way of doing things was ever laid down. It’s just what shakes out after you’ve trained yourself in self-awareness.

OK, one noticing. Yesterday or perhaps the day before (my grip on time is very tenuous these days, I notice) I said that I was going to let go of “cultivating” the transformed space of love, bliss, and ecstacy. I was going to let go of working at it because I was becoming attached to it and I preferred not to be.

So I did let go of the transformed space and, lo and behold, it’s back again today.

I am so blissed out at this moment that I’ve had to retreat to a coffee shop, abandoning my plans to go shopping and simply sit here – and write.

(I note that it’s one day after the 12/12 Ascension portal.)

In terms of following this wave of bliss that’s swept over me since Oct. 3, 2015, let me report that this time I did nothing – not chant a mantra, not read a holy book, not even breathe up love or bliss. The natural state, the transformed space, the energy of love, bliss and ecstacy found me.

I don’t know how and I cannot generate a care about it. I’m just glad it found me. It was like welcoming an old friend.

I let go of the space and the space did not flee from me. It returned to me again the next day without me needing to do anything. One instance is too few to declare a pattern. Recording one incident at a time and providing a record for the use of the structuralists (the pattern finders) and evolutionists is the task of ethnography.

If you love something, set it free. If it returns to you, it’s yours. If it does not, it never was.

Welcome, bliss.